Field Note: My “Love” and My Art
The definition of love is… I can’t even begin to list the many definitions of it, according to Merriam-Webster, but just know it can be an expression and emotion for most, if not all, human beings.
Why am I talking about love in this field note? It’s something I’ve always been curious about in relation to my art.
My definition of love from the dictionary is “strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties” (Merriam-Webster) meaning I hold strong ties to black women and girls as I am a black woman.
Because of this love, I wanted to see them in media since I was a little girl. Most of the books I’ve read in libraries and in school teachings along with TV shows held white women as the lead, love interest, fantasy being, expressive person in most media I’ve came across.
And what about black women? Angry, tough, rough, ghetto, disposable love interest, “magical negro” who aids white leads, the comedic side character with outdated humor, and many other negative stereotypes.
This love of wanting to see black girls and women in positive roles in things I’m interested int turned into rage that slowly transferred into my art. How?
If you look around on my website, you’ll just see the surface layer of my work. Bright colors, 3D objects surrounding portraits, and black women and girls in soft expressions. However, really think about why they are the way they are.
How often do you see black femmes as dragons, mermaids, and nymphs? What about as goddess or guardians watching over you? Even a black artist describing themselves as an adventurer? Sure, you can try to say it’s to make pretty art, but that’s not my goal. This is where the rage comes in.
Why must I have to go this far to created these pieces this way? There have been other artists before me who could’ve had black women and girls as their muses, but they didn’t. Authors before the ones we have today could have had black women as leads and love interests until the last page, but they didn’t do that. Showrunners creating shows that hurt black women’s image sometimes or made their actresses uncomfortable to the point of leaving.
Why must it always be us to come in and show the world how we should be presented as? That’s the rage I’m feeling. It’s amplified when my people were told in 2020, we didn’t belong in the fantasy genre; that we should be “thankful” orcs and ogres were based off us (I’m still looking if this is true or not).
So, I express my love and rage out in my artworks beyond just pretty pictures. My love for black women and girls translated into art about being in a fantasy setting, being a guardian, and being seen in a positive light. My love transfers over in celebrating a black girl’s geeky side. My love giving comfort to a black woman to share her inner child’s love for fantasy. My love opening doors for them to dare to dream what would was considered “white” from communities who stunted them.
This is the reason why I created it. I love fantasy, art, and black stories. I can’t imagine continuing to shelter myself back to keep things “in order.” Every time I try to do such a thing, I feel into a deep depression that I mask over heavily. I would rather create for myself and the ones who had held back.
It’s time to let loose and go all out. For my love and for my art.